Friday, July 6, 2012

Will New Eden Burn?


It began as it always does, with hurt pride and the promise of vengeance.

This podcast [Link] perhaps unintentionally, has become a rallying cry for the legions of clone soldiers that reside in New Eden. While many of them have heard the horror stories of the exploits of The Goonswarm, most of them have never had an actual encounter with the real thing. For these soldiers to hear a transmission where one of the most powerful alliances allegedly views them as little more than expendable cannon fodder may have been the impetus for an uprising of Spartacus style proportions.

 "Guess what? I'm not scared of Goonswarm, I don't care how many ships they have. This is planetary warfare, they're not gonna command a million ships to attack me, at most they'll have a battalion of soldiers come after me, and as I said they're probably terrible, so it'll be a bloodbath. You honestly expect me to cower in fear because of a group of capsuleer pilots? Come on, pull your head out of your ass." - Mudmaster



Recent Galactic Press reports have referred to the affected as the Anarchist Movement. They are a unique brand of soldier clone that isn't interested in wealth, notoriety or resources. They only want to upset the status quo and render powerless their perceived overlords.Their mantra claims they have little to lose and everything to gain, but many of their detractors consider them blissfully ignorant of what it will take to achieve their goal. For now they organize through secure net postings [Link] and are said to be recruiting countless soldiers to their ranks. There are already whispers of seizing control of Technetium moons and working for the enemies of Goonswarm as a means of bolstering their numbers.

This proposed revolution, like all that have come before it, has support from the lesser power brokers in New Eden, and why wouldn't it? If successful, the vacuum created would provide countless opportunities for those who would seek to seize power.

"No one fears Goonswarm, at least not from my camp. Put an assault rifle in the hands of a pilot, put them on the ground, and then we can talk. Until then they just write a check, a large one." -Youknowutimsayin

 "The second clone soldiers can have some form of control over their own Wardecs I'm proposing a full on Spartacus raid. We're gonna' pick a system as A, and one as B, and we're gonna' burn absolutely everything in a straight line between the two just for **** and giggles." - Phantom Humperdink


"We actually had a fairly nice roast of them a few weeks ago. People seemed to get upset when we asked about their experience in planetside engagements. Goonswarm won't last against me tbh." - xProtoman23

"What you need to understand is that if push comes to shove a lot of us aren't really interested in your paychecks and little politicking. We're just flat out happy to burn your **** given the chance just because we can." - Phantom Humperdink

Are you an idiot? You're not gonna be orbital striking me all day no matter what, hell I don't even think you'll get to orbital strike me. You'll have to do something to allow your ships to get in position to strike me, and you'll have to kill me to let that happen, and we all know that won't happen because, well, capsuleers are horrible at planetary engagements. - Mudmaster

The Unofficial GSF Response was both cryptic and chilling:
Incorrect, we are here, we are watching, we are already determining which of you are the most intelligent, most capable, most organized, most dedicated, most desirable warriors to bring under our our wings on release day. We are already using the beta to winnow the chafe from the grain.


WE don't care about your K/D ratio, it's silly - many of us will spend a great deal of time raining fire on you for the sole reason of ruining that k/d ratio to show you how silly it is.


You thump your silly little chests and speak loudly of your skills and abilities, attempting to proclaim your victory without knowledge of your enemy, without knowledge of your battleground, without even knowledge of your self.


The Goons are not to be feared, but do not make the mistake of underestimating us, in capability or in asshattery. Do not assume your "leet" gun game skills make you a better fighter, for they will not engage on your terms. Like many New Eden corporations Goons attempt to "Win, then fight"


Become experienced in New Eden, travel through goon space, read your history to get an idea of what we have done in the past, and what we will likely do in the future, for the leopard does not change his stripes.



After you have done this, begin planning, begin organizing, begin coordinating. Then perhaps you may find victory.

Good Luck and Good Hunting - and remember "He who know himself and his enemies need not fear the outcome of a thousand battles."

One of the people at the heart of the controversy, Pinky Feldman, had this to say when asked for comment: "Its nice to see groups willing to take on the status quo."


The Anarchists seem supremely confident and answered every net posting with tales of skill and bravado. Some of the names are the same: xProtoman23, Phantom Humperdink, Tony Calif, Mudmaster, Sha Kharn Clone, Gene Dravon, Zion Shad and others, but has this group of agitators bitten off more than they can chew? Or will they be the spark that turns New Eden upside down? Only time and ISK will tell.


43 comments:

  1. Some of you PS3/ MSG etc players are so ignorant. you are in for a big shock!

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  2. and the beta troll brigade gets their own topical thread that makes much more sense then anything that has come out of their mouth's or fingers

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  3. also i think onslaught would be butthurt if u didnt add him in, pdiggy too. :)

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    1. Damn right. I said "Goonswarm was bitch made" and didn't get quoted.

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  4. people seem to forget if dust is successful, console players will outnumber pc players by a bunch.

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    1. first facepalm to the comment section. now we on a roll

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    2. there are more PCs in the world that PS3s I highly doubt dust players will outnumber eve.

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    3. the sub fee is a roadbloack for some. eve has 400k eve players. shooters that sell a million copies are considered a failure. dust also f2p.

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    4. I would hope so! I think that's the whole idea, especially with making it F2P and a console game.

      You would necessarily need more soldiers than pilots, because a pilot commanding a battleship or a carrier can project a hell of a lot more force as an individual than a lone soldier on the ground. There *needs* to be more DUSTies than EVE pilots.

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  5. As of press time, The Mittani had no comment.

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  6. these guys just sit around dry humping each others egos thinking there better than they are.

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  7. I wonder if any of those guys used to be in SVER?

    Just a wild guess...

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  8. "Will New Eden Burn?"

    "Will this blog ever write a decent article?"

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  9. i like this one. actually relevant.

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    1. Who knows you could be the one that wrote it .. trolloLOLoloLOL

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  10. Not to bad of a read actually.

    We'll have to wait and see if the mercs dropsuits can take over solar systems that spaceships inhabit.

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  11. 1. Striped leopards?
    2. Who cares about number of PC's vs Number of consoles. If the engagements are set up for 128 vs 128 or less, I'm pretty sure neither side will have a problem fielding company sized elements.
    3. Really? Striped leopards?

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  12. It is rather sad to see these loud mouths making themselves look bad. Not understanding and respecting EVE will only cause a group coming into DUST 514 to fail.

    This is like a small company of mercs in RL thinking they are good enough to just go take out America. I really do not see how any small group can think that their actions would easily defeat a large established group that has been holding SOV for a long period of time.

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    1. You were a shit MAG player, hop off Goonswarm dick, and please STFU.

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    2. New Eden will burn. Years of peoples lives will be undone and it's going to be glorious.

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  13. Tabloid journalism at its finest. Maybe you should start quoting people who actually matter if you want people to take your writing seriously. Just a thought...

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  14. news flash! the game hasnt launched yet no one matters!

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  15. Even if Goonswarm wanted to destroy the 'Anarchists' they would have to have some alliance corp fight them and have the ability to call in a strike. I would imagine i New Eden there are more people who want Goonswarm to fall. Remember Rome didn't fall in a day but it did FALL

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  16. Get a life people, seriously. The game is mediocre at best.

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  17. its mediocre now. i see the potential. as long as they commit to multiple game types and huge battles.

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  18. zionshad = nameless and bruce harmon. u heard it here first.

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    1. Id like to know more about why you feel this way. Lets just say it could be relevant to my future as a duster.

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    2. Im serious if i find out the guy im in a corp with is using it as more little "news" stories and podcasts im not gonna be happy.

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    3. zion's not harmon he is the leader of zion tcd

      idk who nameless is tho

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  19. Lol this is some real stupid shit. I almost peed leading this ....

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  20. You sell used cars in real life, dont you? Sightly outpaced and outclassed by your colleague Bruno who you suspect is in the witness protection program, and Tiffany, the overweight slightly desperate woman of indeterminate age that used to be a "showgirl" in Vegas....

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    1. Haha I like how you think. That seems probable indeed.

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  21. I really, REALLY, can't wait to see these guys get pwned. They literally have NO IDEA what thy are in for.

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    1. yea, i sincerely suggest we all buy popcorn stocks and await the flood of tears to come when this troll circle jerk gets flattened.

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  22. dust is kewl but Mag is butter

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  23. Im very much looking forward to dust. Not to "burn eden" either. I want to be involved. And im aware of how brutal it can be.

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  24. lol... this game is so awesome...

    the Beta sucks.. but who cares. The Meta Game side of New Eden keeps me coming back.

    It's like a space drama... but with plasma rifles!

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  25. Interesting read. Interesting read…. Just like to throw it out there that I’m not a mag player nor do I have any background in any type of console gaming except dust.
    Neither am I fan of chest beating and personally find it amusing tho I do share some common ground with these other loud mouths as we seem to be referred to now  and that’s throwing bricks at windows. A little chaos is good for the soul.

    I know a fair bit about goons and their activities make for an interesting Eve . I certainly don’t fear them nor anyone for that matter but as an Eve player I do respect them it’s foolish not to respect potential threats.

    Sure these mag players looked for the top dog in eve and wana try and make a name for themselves, well power to em. Personally I don’t care who the dustybunnys have a go at let’s hope they can set a few fires and spice life up a little space side.

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  26. anything these dust bunnies think they can do they wont be able to do within the next year or so whereas the goons can do on a minutes notice.

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